


Fading

by SamanthaM_M



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Agony, Dark, Internal Conflict, Internal Monologue, One Shot, POV First Person, after the fight, he thinks of rey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-05-13 19:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5713552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamanthaM_M/pseuds/SamanthaM_M
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren´s delirious thoughts after fighting Rey on Starkiller base</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fading

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seeyouwithyourlaughterlines](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seeyouwithyourlaughterlines/gifts).



> He´s losing himself and I´m bad at tagging and good at writing short fics

I’m in terrible pain. I’m falling apart. I hear voices on the outside, but I can’t bring myself to listen. All I can concentrate on are the voices in me. The doubt. The regret. The remorse.

It didn’t help. Didn´t work. I don´t feel better. It’s not gone. Why is it still here? I thought it would go away, but it’s still here, gnawing, eating, biting, monster feeding on my suffering, tearing me apart beyond what I thought was possible to bear. Its voice is calling me, scorning me, torturing me. It’s like someone built me anew after tearing every single part of me out and then violently pushing it back after destroying it completely to create this form, this shell. This mockery of me. 

“It” has no form. It’s just a light. But I remember where it came from. I know what it looked like. It was a girl, very young, very strong and made of bright, burning light I desired and hated at the same time. There was fear, but she wasn’t afraid. There was hate, but it wasn’t me who she hated. Maybe… there was still hope. 

But then there’s a movement and the pain is even worse and there are words forming on my bloodied lips and I know they are coming out as a gibberish and mumbling, but I’m sure someone can hear me. She’s the monster.

And I’ll have to get rid of her.


End file.
